Fishing
Naked
Chapter1:
“I thought it had possibilities. You know my husband is always working. I thought it would give me something to do while he’s gone,” replied Sue wearily. Glancing out the window, she caught sight of her mud-streaked and disheveled reflection and sighed. “I didn’t know it was going to sink. Or that the motor would fall off as soon as I got away from the dock.”
“It is a good thing you know how to swim,” joked Jan in a lighthearted attempt to cheer her up.
“Yeah, I didn’t think it could get much worse than when the truck and trailer rolled down the boat ramp into the water. Thank goodness those little old ladies were there to let me use their cell phone. Mine went to the bottom in the truck.”
Both women looked up in surprise when the window a few booths down shattered with a crash. They watched, astounded as a monstrous chartreuse 1976 Chrysler Cordova careened through the opening and into the counter where their lunch had been ready and waiting to be served by their gum popping waitress.
As the car finally lurched to a stop, the driver’s head fell against the horn and stayed there; the sound of the classic Air Supply ballad on the jukebox was drowned out by the blare of the horn. Faintly, then louder, the sounds of police sirens approached.
The women looked at each other wide-eyed, jaws hanging open in shock, as everything came to life simultaneously. Two other diners, who had ducked for cover behind the pool table in the corner, cautiously poked their heads out. The waitress, after accidentally swallowing her gum, finally moved from the kitchen doorway, where she had stood like a deer in headlights during the whole spectacle.
Grabbing her friend’s arm with her neatly polished hand, Jan urged her companion to depart. “Let’s go! Quick! Before the cops get here! There is still an outstanding warrant for me about that whole Krispy Kreme incident. If they catch me here, I’m toast!” Sue nodded her agreement and together they ducked through the kitchen and out the back door to the alley.
Jan’s tasteful brown mary janes skimmed quickly over the dirty concrete. Pulled along like a barge behind a tug boat, Sue panted, “Jan, slow down! I only have one shoe on, remember? The other one sank in the lake.”
Just then, the two rounded the corner and ducked behind a nearby dumpster. “I think we’re safe,” gasped Jan, catching her breath. “Oh damn! I left my purse in the diner. We’re screwed now. I just hope they don’t find us. Shhh! I think I hear something!”
Peeking cautiously around the corner of the scuffed and grafittied brick wall, she saw two uniformed officers coming their way. “Shit!” she said under her breath. Turning back to Sue, she mouthed, “Hide” and pointed to the dumpster. Faster than a hooker in the red light district, both women clumsily climbed over the side and ducked down inside.
Holding her breath, Sue strained to hear what was happening in the alley. The muffled sound of boots on concrete passed by, accompanied by the vague murmur of voices before she relaxed.
This is just NOT my day, Sue thought, looking down at coffee grounds and other unidentifiable garbage clinging to her once pristine yachting outfit and one remaining deck shoe. Unable to contain herself, she began to giggle hysterically.